Since the days of old mankind has been searching for the mythical fountain of youth. It seems that since the beginning of time folks have been trying to remain young and live longer, if not forever. I feel the same way. However, and I can only speak for myself here, I am lazy. The work involved in, say, bathing in the blood of virgins Elizabeth Bathory style or becoming a creature of the night is more than I want to do. I like my sleep. With today’s medical advancements we know that exercise can also slow the aging process and extend life. Exercise? I mean really, I’d rather bathe in blood.
Imagine then my excitement when I read a study proving the health benefits, for men at least, of something that I can really get excited about:
(Image borrowed from Dark Matters)
That’s right, fellas….Boobies!!!
Ponce de Leon buddy, the fountain of youth was right in front of you all the time!!!
Its all there in black and white. I’m going to live forever!!!!
Gents, before you run off to tell your significant others about your new health club membership to Hooters, I must admit that this study in an urban legend. I know, I cried when I found out too. Turns out this “study” has been making its way around cyberspace for a number of years but neither Dr. Weatherby nor the study actually exist. My suspicions were aroused when I saw another version of the story that included the quote:
“Dr. Weatherby and fellow researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany, reached the startling conclusion after comparing the health of 200 male outpatients – half of whom were instructed to look at busty females daily, the other half told to refrain from doing so. The study revealed that after five years, the chest-watchers had lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and fewer instances of coronary artery disease”.
Now tell me, where did they find 100 men who could refrain from looking at breasts for 5 minutes, let alone 5 years? Said males would have to be playing for the home team as it were and would nullify any true scientific study, correct?
But should we be downhearted men? Should we simply give up an allow the aging process to play merry havoc with our physique when the answer might just be staring us in the face? I say, urban legend or not, that this might just be a sign pointing to a new frontier of medical research. I say we carry on the work started by our new fictional superhero Dr. Weatherby and see if she just might have been on to something after all! Who will join me?
Bosom buddies of the world: unite!
Hmmmm…I wonder how many years it takes off a man’s life every time he gets slapped?
OMG.
Why chance it? You’re better off safe than sorry, and I doubt that boob watching would ever make you sorry.
i’m sure the same could be said for women if we could watch men do housework.
lol, that was funny Angela!
That’s hilarious Angela.
It never occurred to me that maybe I could help my wife live longer by letting her gaze at mine.
🙂 I think the underlying truth to this is that one has to enjoy looking at the breasts in question. I doubt that Karen, even with her love-blinders on, thinks man-boobs are sexy! But then again….
Tom, you kill me. 🙂 LOL
Carl, I think your spending a little too much time on the internet buddy although I’m secretly glad for the new weight loss information. Urban legend. Hogwash! This really works.
Its not the amount of time one spends, its having a nose to sniff out useful information like this here men’s health regimen.
Well, we can at least be certain that it is good for a man’s MENTAL health, if nothing else.
As for the ladies, it is reported as accurate that Erzebet Bathory was a very youthful-looking middle-aged woman at the time of her trial, and didn’t start looking old until after being deprived of her special baths. Makes you wonder. . .
I just had a very annoying salesman stop by trying to sell one of those magic cleaners.
I couldn’t get rid of him. He kept going on and on about all the things it will clean. At one point he looked at my boobs and said it will even take out breast milk stains!!! I am thinking, “Do I look like I’m lactating or something?” I very, very seriously doubt it!!
Well, at least looking at breasts won’t cause me to go blind.
I just wrote a lengthy exposition on the merits of chest gazing then I erased it. There seems to be a fine line here and I wonder if the next time we’re all together the rule of “all eyes are to be neck up” will apply. Of course with the exception of noticing lactation stains…
Carl, you actually had me going for a second there.
Of course James may go blind after Julie socks him in the eye…
Jules, I can’t believe a salesman would make that comment. Talk about harassment!
Angela, where would we find these men who do housework? ha, ha! Actually Carl does a fine job of deep cleaning. He is great at dusting and vacuuming. We made a deal: I don’t dust and he doesn’t clean the bathroom. :o)
Sorry Tom, I had to share my Uncle Rico moment. The timing was too perfect.
Mary, then he wanted to use the stuff to remove my toenail polish! He got down like he was going to squirt my toes and I said NO NO NO YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TOUCH MY TOES!!!! What a creep!
This post gave me a wonderful laugh!
Julie, I would have socked him a good one then asked him if it cleaned up blood stains with no trace evidence!
Jules, you’ve got to learn how to slam the ol’ door!
Don’t worry about any fine lines Tom, I obliterated those simply by posting this! 😉
Julie you passed up on a free pedicure?
I couldn’t slam the door; I was outside with the kids. I kept waiting for James to look out the shop window and come to my rescue.
I always think of clever things to say after I’ve been harrassed.
Funny Tom.
You should’ve just had Elaina start punching him, she’s quite proficient and she’s at that perfect dangerous height right now!
This post is hilarious!! Jules what a funny story. You should have taken a picture of the guy and did a post on it! 🙂
Too funny! He was probably just trying to stay healthy by doing a little mammary gazing.
I know it doesn’t work for women. I’ve been gazing at big ones all my life. . .
(I probably should erase that.)
Too late now, big guy! 😉
everybody needs a bosom for a pillow…sing along if you know it…
I don’t, but that should definitely be my new themesong!!!
Again, I guess I should erase my name from the “public” blog at work. The emoticons are a dead giveaway. It’s hard to exactly copy my writing style and comments but someone is trying.
Maybe so, but whoever it is knows you very, very well. I assumed the ‘big ones’ comment had to do with your man-boob comment…
That was me, Babe! That was supposed to be a post under Karen. I forgot to erase the big guy’s name. It looked pretty funny that way and totally changed the post! 🙂
Too funny, Karen!!!