The title of this post is a myth of sorts as the truth is that they called her practically unsinkable.

I am researching and composing this post on the evening of April 14th. At 11:40 p.m. on this very evening in 1912, the Titanic experienced its fateful collision with an iceberg. I will post this on April 15th, the day that marks the 93rd anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic.

My fascination with the Titanic dates back to the early 1990’s when I was working in Waldenbooks in Tulsa, OK and picked up this book:

and saw these images, among others:

I was hooked. I had always been interested in the depths of the ocean and this birthed an intense connection with the disaster of the Titanic. To realize that this wreckage of what was once a luxury liner filled with people was actually sitting at the bottom of the dark, cold sea filled me with an equal amount of awe and horror. Its images are beautiful and sad and scary at the same time. It is estimated that it took 2 hours and 40 minutes for the Titanic to sink to its depth of 12,500 feet. And there it sat, in total darkness, unseen by human eyes for 73 years. The ship that was ‘practically unsinkable’ and was thought impossible to find was discovered in 1985.

Robert Ballard, born in Witchita, Kansas, (and looking an awful lot like my uncle Jack) has said, “I grew up wanting to be Captain Nemo from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.” And it can easily be said that he has done that and more. Robert Ballard has not only discovered the Titanic, but has found many other lost ships including two ancient Phoenician ships off the coast of Israel, the oldest ships ever found in deep water, and most recently John F. Kennedy’s PT-109.

Ballard’s 1985 discovery of the Titanic and the events leading up to it can be seen on National Geographic’s Secrets of the Titanic. This documentary is amazing and the first time I saw it I was not only stunned into silence as I saw Titanic for the first time

but also was ready to dump my current career and go hunting for lost ships! There are many amazing images from this documentary including:

a chandelier

and the ship’s wheel:

It is so creepy to think of being confined to a tin-can like submarine, sinking quietly to that depth in darkness, only to come into contact several hours later with the remains of this tragedy. A few years ago my friend Scott and I were snorkeling in a state park in Hawaii and were the only 2 people out in this area of the ocean. We were following this big sea turtle and came across a large piece of debris that looked like part of a giant engine, sitting in about 20 feet of water. It was covered with plant life and sea creatures and it really gave me the creeps because I associated it with all the other pieces of boats and ships that undoubtedly litter the bottom of the oceans. As eerie as it would be I’d love to be able to take one of those submarine tours down to view the Titanic.

Of course the discovery of the Titanic renewed interest in this unforeseen tragedy which eventually led to the much maligned Titanic movie starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet.

I personally enjoy this movie but can easily understand why many do not. I’m not a big fan of DiCaprio but I liked Winslet in her role. The love story was a little overblown but the scenes of the ship sinking and people lying dead in the water really got to me. I think James Cameron’s ridiculous Oscar speech helped solidify public hatred for this big budget love story. If you haven’t ever seen it or just haven’t seen it in a long time I suggest you check out Titanic in 30 seconds with bunnies. It really is only 30 seconds long and amazingly enough summarizes the whole 3+ hours of Titanic in that brief period of time….with bunnies no less!!!

This renewed interest also spawned the Tony award winning Titanic: The Musical. I have no desire to ever see this. Visions of singers belting out show tunes while dancers soft-shoe their way to the icy depths horrifies me more than the actual tragedy!

In June of 2004, almost 20 years after his first visit, Robert Ballard returned to the Titanic. I have not seen this documentary but look forward to a future viewing. As expected Ballard found damage caused by the passage of time.

Unfortunately he also discovered much destruction from personal submarines landing on the deck as well as many artifacts missing. Someone had actually taken the plaque that Ballard left on the discovery mission to honor the lives of those lost. You can listen to some of the interviews Ballard did around this time period at the NPR site.

I admire Robert Ballard greatly as he has a historian’s appreciation for the things that he finds. He understands that the Titanic site is essentially the grave site for the 1,500 people who perished when it sank. He has some interesting ideas about treating these sites as museums and setting up underwater cameras so that people can “visit” these shipwrecks and explore them for themselves. I like this idea much better than pilfering the locations for their contents and having pieces scattered in various private and public museums. The sinking of the Titanic is indeed fascinating. There are as yet unsolved mysteries regarding this tragedy as well as a host of conspiracy theories surrounding its sinking. As fascinating as the story is, in retrospect it was still a horrible tragedy. I will leave you with these thoughts of Robert Ballard:

“The Titanic isn’t a ship. It’s an accident. It’s a huge debris field. The Titanic is linked to its location. When you see pairs of shoes on the bottom of the ocean where the body landed, and those pairs of shoes are perfectly preserved and sitting exactly relative to the body that’s now vanished, those shoes and their juxtaposition to one another, and sitting on the floor next to the ship are a much more compelling message — a personal message of tragedy — than some wrinkly old shoes sitting on a shelf in a museum in Memphis, Tennessee.”

“The spark of intelligence in your blinking eyes is not unlike the glow from the teeth of an electrocuted axe-murderess. “

Jenn See discovered this fun link the other day and I’ve been meaning to post on it over here. It is the Surrealist Compliment Generator. Each refresh will give you another bizarre, fun, surreal compliment.

For whatever reason the quotes generated on that site remind me of absurdist British humor and so this post fits in with the spirit of the previous one. I also mentioned to Jenn See on her site that the quotes remind me of the strange verse we created when playing with Magnetic Poetry during some of our more laborious staff meetings! Here are a few compliments that I received from the SCG that I share lovingly with you, the readers:

“Your eyebrows are as verdantly forrested as the seeded woodworms of my most sombre dreams.”

“The quietness of a manhole cover cannot compare with the wild vapours of nylon I sense in your larynx.”

“Your unexpected explosion entangles us in a web of premature umbrellas and precocious timepieces.”

“The sisters of Catherine the Great ask that you cover yourself with lightbulb filaments and take pains to make yourself fully incandescent this evening.”

“The perils of your eyelashes torture my libido into a state of crass belief in Roman Catholicism.”

“Madame, ist thou donning space underwear? For thine ass doth lie beyond the physical boundaries of this world!”

and, last but not least is one that I think I will make my new mantra:

“May clinging breasts always come to your aid in the kitchen.”

Have fun with this. Occasionally you’ll get one in a foreign language, the humor of which is lost on me!

It is indeed spring and with sunny days, warming weather, and the return of the beautiful colors of nature comes the desire to delve into the stories of P.G. Wodehouse. There is no other author who I consider as quintessentially ‘spring’ as Wodehouse. His work makes you happy and makes your heart light. He is one of the few authors whom I have read who makes me laugh out loud. There is a biography of P.G. Wodehouse here. Its a quick but fascinating read and I recommend that you nip over there quickly before continuing.

Mistaken identities, reckless engagements, tyranical uncles, looney aunts, genius butlers, madcap adventures, outrageous plots, thwarted lovers, and a royal pig are just some of the many things one can find in the farcical tales of Wodehouse.

Wodehouse is the English comic writer. I first discovered Wodehouse through his most famous characters, Bertie Wooster and his man-servant Jeeves.

I happened to catch a few episodes on PBS years ago and rushed out immediately and began consuming Wodehouse. I bought this entire set for Mary for Christmas 2 years ago and it is wonderful. If you have a chance to watch these you will not be disappointed.

Second only to Jeeves and Wooster in popularity is his fictional world of Blandings Castle. A few years ago a wonderful company called Overlook Press began releasing hardback versions of Wodehouse’s work in a series called The Collector’s Wodehouse. I much prefer hardback books when I can get them and so I slowly began collecting volumes that I had not yet read, impatiently awaiting the day that my favorite Wodehouse book would be released: Something Fresh.

I had pre-ordered this months ago from Amazon.com and was so excited when it came in the mail today. I’ve been aching to read this book again! Its a great jumping on point if you’re new to Wodehouse as it is the first of the Blandings Castle novels. I would also recommend the Mulliner books. They are a series of tales told to patrons in a local pub by Mr. Mulliner concerning his relatives. The tales become quite tall in the telling and usually involve a series of mishaps with the said Mulliner coming out all right in the end. The first of this series is Meet Mr. Mulliner.

They are great short story books that are marvelously amusing and are another great introduction to Wodehouse. And of course you can never go wrong with a Jeeves/Wooster novel.

At this point I may not have convinced you, but believe me when I say that Wodehouse is a pure delight to read. A few of the multitude of characters who populate his novels are:

Bertie Wooster, Oofy Prosser, Barmy Fungy-Phipps, the honorable Frederick Threepwood, Gussie Fink-Nottle, Pongo Twistleton, Roderick Spode, Lord Emsworth, and The Empress of Blandings (a pig).

And here is a sampling of the many amusing quotes from Wodehouse novels:

“She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say ‘when.’ “

“Marriage isn’t a process of prolonging the life of love, but of mummifying the corpse.”

“A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of someone who had searched for the leak in life’s gas pipe with a lighted candle.”

“There is only one cure for grey hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.”

“As for Gussie Finknottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming on sight.”

and

“She gave me the sort of look she would have given a leper she wasn’t fond of.”

In his 93 years of life Sir P.G. Wodehouse was quite prolific. He wrote more than 70 novels, wrote in excess of 300 short stories, contributed at least 800 pieces to about 80 journals and, by writing more than 200 lyrics for musical comedies, is acknowledged to be one of the founders of the modern stage-musical. (Man I feel like a slacker!!!!)

Wodehouse is English comedy at its absolute finest. Your local library and bookstore are filled with Wodehouse delights, partake of some today!