“The spark of intelligence in your blinking eyes is not unlike the glow from the teeth of an electrocuted axe-murderess. “
Jenn See discovered this fun link the other day and I’ve been meaning to post on it over here. It is the Surrealist Compliment Generator. Each refresh will give you another bizarre, fun, surreal compliment.
For whatever reason the quotes generated on that site remind me of absurdist British humor and so this post fits in with the spirit of the previous one. I also mentioned to Jenn See on her site that the quotes remind me of the strange verse we created when playing with Magnetic Poetry during some of our more laborious staff meetings! Here are a few compliments that I received from the SCG that I share lovingly with you, the readers:
“Your eyebrows are as verdantly forrested as the seeded woodworms of my most sombre dreams.”
“The quietness of a manhole cover cannot compare with the wild vapours of nylon I sense in your larynx.”
“Your unexpected explosion entangles us in a web of premature umbrellas and precocious timepieces.”
“The sisters of Catherine the Great ask that you cover yourself with lightbulb filaments and take pains to make yourself fully incandescent this evening.”
“The perils of your eyelashes torture my libido into a state of crass belief in Roman Catholicism.”
“Madame, ist thou donning space underwear? For thine ass doth lie beyond the physical boundaries of this world!”
and, last but not least is one that I think I will make my new mantra:
“May clinging breasts always come to your aid in the kitchen.”
Have fun with this. Occasionally you’ll get one in a foreign language, the humor of which is lost on me!
Perhaps I should quit while I’m ahead:
Oh!, how you inflict me with wounds of paranoia and desire.
Its Nick!!! The woman drowned in a sea of schoolwork! I’m looking forward to your return to the land of the living! (you’re not taking summer school are you?)
And I agree, that is one heck of a compliment! Oddly enough it reminds me of Wonderfalls! 🙂
Your Hands do the work of 10,000 highly trained lesbian jumping beans.
(I should ask for a raise at work!!)
If seen on a disintegrating smokestack, your eyelashes would certainly compell even a wayward band of masticating cod into a feverish frenzy.
(Here’s another eyelash one for you, Carl.)
Never pet your dog when it is on fire.
Wise advice!…good luck with that raise! 🙂
Here’s one for Julie:
“You are as frightful as an engine developed solely for the countenance of sexual inuendo by country music.”
Not because she is frightening, but because she shares a love of country music!
And guys, here’s one to use on the ladies:
“Your legs are like threads of cotton, though much thicker, and filled with weevils.”
Here’s one to live by:
Your brilliant hematoma does beguile the natives.
And for Sunshine the Cat:
‘Lo, EUREKA,’ I yelled into the cat, ‘Thou art truly laborious and divergent. My nose bleeds for your impending encounter with the front fender of a Mercedes Benz.’
not that I wish Sunshine dead…
Another one for the love of your life:
“Your sweet voice is like the snap of a bra strap upon a sun burnt back.”
Hey Sunshine has been doing really good w/ Motley. This morning I was laying on the couch w/ the dog & Sunshine came and layed by me – I almost had a heart attack.
And, here is a little morning laugh……………..
If you were a camel your humps would be esoterically bald from overuse.
“Your eyebrows are as verdantly forrested as the woodworms of my most sombre dreams”
I had that one a loooong time ago.
I found it written on something of mine
and wondered where it came from. I googled it, and
It took me here. Thank you for posting the link to the
generator!